Dr Borinson's Hit List

    Vengeance is mine said the Lord - but let's face it, the rest of us would like a go with that sword.
    So here's my hit list:

    1 Eliza Carthy's hairdresser. Either the guy's got a secret vendetta against her or a very sick sense of humour.

    2 The person who let Alanis Morrissette have a mouth organ. If you don't know what I'm talking about just listen to the first thirty seconds of her debut album.

    3 Paul Simon - for taking a perfectly good English folk song and ruining it for the rest of us.

    4 The EFDSS - for taking a perfectly good tradition and not inflicting on the rest of us.

    5 Les Barker's tailor. (See no 1 above)

    6 Earl Scruggs. For inventing banjo detuners. If a thing's broke why break it more?

    7 Dave Benton. For inventing Dr Borinson.

    8 The Grand Ole Oprey. For making money from innocent people's suffering.

    9 Austin Morris. For inventing Morris dance.
    (Editor's note: are Morris Minors still illegal in the southern states of the USA and Lancashire?)

    10 Michael Atherton. OK, I know it's not folk but I'm English and it has to be said.

    what was that he said up there?